"I must find some way to keep Christmas from coming...but how?!"

No, I don't hate Christmas...but who can't empathize with the Grinch a little bit? Sneering out at the happy go lucky who's with all their hoopla and merriment. But my issue with Christmas fast approaching is perhaps a little different - if anything I wish we could just keep it on the horizon even longer!I love this time of year with its themes and traditions and twinkling lights...I even like having an excuse to say something nice to someone. Usually I have an excuse to say something crappy.
But I must say this year has been especially sweet. Aaron B., my longtime partner in crime and the other half of Defective Agency, was awesome enough to get us some tickets to catch Tim & Eric live in Atlanta in February! How cool is that?! I got to see them this past March just before Season 3 of Awesome Show came out - it was pretty mind-bending. And Atlanta is supercool....and I get to roadtrip with my best friend! Merry Christmas off and running!

Meanwhile, Christmas downtown is a pretty nifty thing. With all the businesses with their window lights, and the bank with the big bell drawn with colored office lights, plus everyone shuffling around in scarves and santa hats - its hard not to get in the spirit. Even my neighbor Sydney the bum, who lives under the overpass and showers with a bucket, is sporting a santa hat these days! Now thats some Christmas cheer for that ass!

Also adding to my Christmas this year was a brief encounter with my new favorite Tiger...Doneal Mack. Yes, he has stars shaved in his head like a Sneetch...but he has to be the breakout player of the season. He's the only one out there so far that is rising above his expectations..anyway, I happened upon him, Shaun Taggart & Jeff Robinson in the lobby of the Forum the other night on my way in to catch the Grizz ending their winning streak. The other guys were quick to roll eyes and roll out at the sight of an oncoming white boy fan, but Doneal was actually way cool and a very nice guy.

And, oh my God, how could I forget?! Finally, 20 years after we began our quest...Aaron & I revisited and FINALLY beat Raiders of the Lost Ark for the Atari 2600! A ridiculously bizarre and rather involved (for the time) game...I guesss you could say it was ahead of its time in that it is a quest and you have have to explore and find things and figure out what they do and how to use them. But don't get me wrong - its retarded. Which wall the more reason to cheer when we finally sat back down together to beat it. We came close in the second grade, but we didn't have online walkthroughs or beer back then.

Well, I hope you all keep it Crunk n Merry...I am sure I will see many of you either at my Christmas party or perhaps in the days leading up to Christmas. 2008 has been a swell year, you guys. I hope 2009 can hold a candle to it. This being that special time of year (for me to poop on), and what with the economy being in the dump heap, I thought i would leave you with a jolly, yet purely capitalistic, Christmas message:

December is upon us once again...

December - The most happenin month of the year. And boy, this one is no disappointment. Money troubles abound. Gas is a buck fitty for the first time in 5 years. One of my best friends is having a baby. Another is getting married. i am turning 30. 30! The Tigers stand to actually lose some games. Whoa - feeling dizzy. Let me tak it one step at a time here...
First off, we went to Nashville for Thanksgiving to see my Aunt Leslie and her fam. Awesome time - Nashville is undeniably impressive. I see why Jack White saw fit to post up there. Opry Mills has got it going on - the hotel, the mall...and now they have a big mega-aquarium?!
We were there to see the Rckette's Christmas Special. A friend asked me later "Aren't they all old by now?!" and all I can say to that is...well, I'll tell you what, I will be nice and keep it to myself. Pit being, they keep these goils young and fresh. Ooh-la-la. But I have to say, the show was pretty awesome. I hadn't seen mega-stage production values like that since I used to get dragged to mega-church Passion Plays as a kid. Real camels in the nativity scene go along way to wow a crowd. Or at least me and my Uncle Dave.
My interest was snagged by nashville's ICE! They are currently doing the Grinch for what is apparently its final year. As you may know, I am a Dr. Seuss, and particularly a Grinch, fanboy. I have been a junkie since I can remember - the Grinch is an awesome combination of creepiness and pathos. And his teeth are great. But I didn't know what the ICE! thing was - I figured it was Grinch on Ice...an ice skating adventure a la Sesame Street or whatever else they do on ice. my aunt told us they had ice sccculptures and kept it so cold you had to wear the big coats they give you. Upon getting back to my compuetr though, I found that the ice sculpures are the Grinch! Now I can't figure out if thats cooler or lamer than ice skating. I ain't real big on mascot looking figure skaters and lame music....but at least they move. But I have to think this thing could be neat to see once. So i think Mom and i may go check it out...
And, yes, its my birthday this week. Tuesday I will be a real grownup. 30. How ridiculous. But I guess everything pretty much feels like I am doing what I need to be. I love my work. I love my parents and my dog. My friends are all cool. I wish they would quit moving away, but that's another blog for another day.
If you REALLY wanna know what I am looking forward to (like i am sure you do) - my annual Christmas jammy jam is Saturday the 20th this year, following the early Tigers game. Last year was very cool, but i kept my invites to a nil because my place wasn't fully up and running. This year, though, all bets are off and if you have made it to this blog, well, by God, you are invited!

I will be having a miniparty the night before for those who can't make it Saturday or thos whojust want a double dose of that pimpin. Bring something to add to the mix - your favorite drank mix, a dessert, a spicy tuna roll, whateva. You know how we roll.
This year I will have twice the room to spread out, with a second room for turntables, extra seating, atari & nintendo, cable, etc. Last year was way fun - even Arrow Dog had a good time!
OH! And while I am thinking about it - a qucick list of good and bad things:
GOOD:
1) The new Star Wars cartoon. Thought it would SUCK. Instead its got me hooked. Who knew?!
2) Shopping on Amazon. You all got cool gifts coming this year, friends.
3) Soul Coughing - Remember them? I loved "Rolling". There is a cool animated video for it on Youtube.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gxyhp1v2A7A
4) I get to be best man at Aaron B's wedding!
NOT BAD, BUT NOT TOO GREAT EITHER:
1) Step Brothers. Those two dudes sleepwalked through that movie. Funny moments, but I expected A-game material from this crew. This was more like Waterboy than Billy Madison.
JUST FLAT OUT BAD. SHITTY, EVEN:
1) This economy blows! It is amazing that everything could strike so harshly and suddenly - and I wish there was something witty I could say about it to make it seem silly - but it is affecting everyone I know and so many I don't. These layoff numbers are real deal, folks. That's people with few presents to give this year. Our shop feels it every time one of our clients goes out of business or defaults on their bills. So give somebody an extra hug and something nice for Christmas this year. Hopefully Obama Claus is gonna bring the change for 09...
2) Santa Claus The Movie - remember that one?? With Dudley Moore and John Lithgow? With the magic suckers?!?!? It magically sucked alright....It was so lame I think I will have to rent it next time I hit Black Lodge.
Merry Christmas bitches!